I Was DeadOctober 28, 2015
My first time doing Salvia was completely insane, to put it bluntly.
Me and my friend, Catrina, were bored one day and couldn’t get any marijuana (this is the only drug I’ve previously tried, except for alcohol, and I must say Salvia is 100x more intense).
So, we decided to walk down to the smoke stop and try Salvia. We bought a bottle of 22x and went home.
Before we tried it, we waited for my mom to go to bed and got some weed. We quickly skimmed through this site (and I mean we were done in like two minutes) and decided we were good to go.
I later saw this was a huge mistake as I really didn’t know what to expect so it resulted in a bad, bad trip.
First, I’m going to explain what happened through my eyes.
I called my boyfriend and had him on speaker the entire time, while I was on webcam with him as well, set up my 2L bucket, packed the bowl full and brewed it. As I was brewing it, my boyfriend said, ‘Woaaaaah that shit is going to fuck you up!’ I was excited for this and took the hit. I held it in as long as I could, I’d say about 20-30 seconds. After I exhaled everything seemed normal, and I remember saying, ‘wow… nothing is happening…’ and that was the last thing I actually remember doing. After I said this, I noticed everything started to look like it was made out of books on a book case. I could make out everything, but it was all blocky, almost like Lego. Then it began like… it’s hard to explain… my view of it was basically zoomed up until all I could see was this infinite book case. In the upper corner of this vision I saw a very faint picture of a man at a podium and he was saying, ‘you have completed life’ and I think he may of said something else but I forget…
All I know is that at that point I was really scared. It felt like I forgot I was even on Salvia, I definitely did not feel in my body at all. Like I was in a dream. I had flashbacks of some of the people who were in my life and it was horrible realizing everything I had with them was pointless, everything I did in my life was pointless. I still had the vision of the book case and soon the man at the podium was gone, and I was left with nothing. I wanted to be alive again, and I remember the book case started moving and it was forming letters. I then began chanting ‘life’ in my head (or so I thought), because I was hoping the letters would form a message of sorts. The letters were still made out of the book case, and they were each a vibrant colour (yellow, red, blue, green). I then noticed the louder I chanted what it was spelling out, the faster it formed. I was eager to get an answer out of this so I was saying it extremely loud. Then I felt some force pull me out of it, and I don’t really remember what happened exactly.. I know I felt like rubber basically, or in a place of low gravity. I don’t remember what I saw or what I was thinking. After some period of time I felt someone shaking me and I was so incredibly happy to be back alive I almost felt like screaming for joy… until I realized I was at home and my mom was here too, and I thought I did something while on Salvia and woke my mom up and they called an ambulance or something. I was relieved to see it was only Catrina, and then everything started puzzling together. That I never actually died, that I was just on Salvia. I then remember saying (it took me a few tries to form this as I was still tripping), ‘what the fucking fuck, I can’t believe that just fucking happened, leave me alone for like ten minutes’, and I went to my room and got my blanket (unconsciously.. I have no idea why I did this..). I could not stop touching it because it was real! I wasn’t actually dead and it was real, it was here, I was alive. I went back into the room Catrina was and I sat down in the corner with the blanket on top of me. I don’t remember what I was thinking, but Catrina left me alone and was just talking to my boyfriend. I don’t remember what they were saying either. After however many minutes, I started crying. But these were tears of joy. I had never been so happy to be alive in my life. I told Catrina that it felt like I had died and I was just so incredibly happy to be alive. She told me that I had scared her and I responded with telling her I scared myself too and explained to her what happened in my head. As I was doing this I felt my bottom morphing into the chair, and after I was done explaining what happened I began giggling and said, ‘My leg is morphing into the chair, this is awesome.’ I thought I was sobering up but I kept remembering my trip, so I packed a few bowls for myself and said, ‘I need to go back to reality!’ Once I was high the effects of the Salvia had worn off completely and I felt great, yet still slightly traumatized. After this, I definitely changed my view on life a lot (that there may very well be nothing after death and that this is all meaningless), but it was for the better as this is a more realistic view, and definitely made me appreciate life a lot more.
Now… this is what I was happening in reality when I was ‘dead’, according to Catrina.
After I had taken the hit, I started moving things around on the desk recklessly, just thrashing them about. Thankfully Catrina took the bucket away so I didn’t spill it. I then laid my arm out horizontally on the desk and laid my head on it. Soon I began speaking gibberish and drooling (probably when I was chanting the words being spelled since she told me it sounded like I was saying ‘life’). Then I began screaming at the top of my lungs (this was making the words appear faster as I said before… but while my Mom was sleeping? Ouch.). Catrina didn’t want my mom to wake up so she covered my mouth (this was the force taking me out of that state), but I began drooling all over her hand and apparently attempted to bite it? She obviously removed her hand and I just like fell over onto her knee and began biting it haha! I totally don’t remember doing this of course, and have no idea why I would. She moved me to get me off of her, and this was the shaking force I felt. After this I remember everything pretty well, except for that time spent under the blanket, and it’s all described above.
After a trip like this, you would think I wouldn’t do it again, but I did the following week with Catrina again. This time I took a slightly lower dosage and it was amazing. I sat there for five minutes laughing hysterically at this mushroom forest poster in my room. Never been happier. I then got up and went to my computer, and saw my ex was talking to me on MSN and found this to be the funniest thing ever and began laughing again and insulting him haha, it was great!
So yeah, Salvia has a lot of different effects and you should always be prepared for whatever may come. Do your research. Nothing can completely prepare you for your first experience but it’s better than not being prepared at all. Definitely make sure you have someone sober around to watch you, and try to find someone you trust and who knows how to handle people on Salvia. I think my trip would have been a lot better if I saw what was being spelled out, since my friend ruined it by covering my mouth (which scared me a bit as well).
I wish you the best experience, and if you get an out of body experience like me, do your best to remember that you are still on earth and had simply took a drug that makes you feel that way.